Years and years ago, I had sex with a guy I didn’t like much at all. I don’t know what led me to fucking around with him, except at that point in time my mood was so low that every second act was self-destructive. He wanted to fuck me, but kept losing his erection. After a while, I gave him a blowjob and made him come, but not before I grabbed his hand while he was fucking me and pushed it firmly up against my throat. He didn’t understand how much I wanted him to hurt me and that any pleasure I got from us fucking was that it took me one step closer to complete self-loathing which was all I thought I was ultimately capable of. Later, I went to piss after he’d left and realised that the condom had slipped off while we were fucking, I guess when he was losing his hard-on, and was stuck in my cunt. Seemed like the right kind of ending for a horrible day.
(via geexiness)